By Janet & Tony Seahorn
Thanksgiving 2018
Hard to believe another year has passed. Hopefully, your year was pretty awesome, filled
with amazing adventures and loving memories. For others, it may have been a year filled with
vast challenges. Yet, for most of us the year was probably a combination of both…. joy and
heartache, peace and chaos, and, at times, unforeseen losses and extraordinary blessings. For us
in each of these moments we were always surrounded by amazing family members, friends, and
many special strangers that came forth to shed light in darkness and serenity in daily miracles.
Family
As we begin the holiday season with Thanksgiving we wanted to take a few moments to
be grateful. Grateful for the love and health of our family. Grateful for old and new friends that
we felt support and gentleness during some pretty rough days. Grateful for spiritual strength that
kept us moving through these days and showed us how fortunate we were even on those days
when we only felt at a loss.
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We often forget to be grateful for good health until we lose it. We often forget to be
grateful for our food until we are hungry or grateful for the warmth of our homes until we are
homeless. We often forget to be grateful for our first responders who make life safer for each of
us. And most often in our busy days we forget to be grateful for all our veterans and their
families – past, present, and future, who sacrificed much so that Americans can live in a country
where we have so many freedoms that many places in our world live without.
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This year we are grateful for each of our joys, our struggles, what we have and what we
miss. Recently we have been grateful for the addition of our new service dog from NEADS,
Trooper 1760.

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Guest Blog by John DiCiacco

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I dedicate my short story to all the Men and Women that came home from
war and discovered that the War and all its tragic memories came home
with them.
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Did you ever wonder why God spelled backwards is Dog.  I used to ponder
that thought a great deal, that is until I met my first Service Dog
Wyatt.  Named him after Wyatt Earp.  Wyatt was not a Registered Service
Dog you see and he didn’t go to School and get a Degree to be a Service
Dog.  To me, though, Wyatt was much more than a Service Dog.  He was my
Savior, my Salvation and he was given to me by God.
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Wyatt came into my Life about Sixteen Years ago and until his death at
only Eleven he remained a Faithful Companion and Confident.  As a
Vietnam Veteran living with PTS, Wyatt was my Soul Mate, so when he
crossed over, a part of me had died as well.  Worse yet, many of the
emotions I felt when I came home in February 1970 was suddenly staring
me in the face.  Guilt, abandonment, distrust and yes, even anger.  I
threatened to crawl into the bottle again, that is until Wyatt showed up
in a vision and I remembered how good my life was with Wyatt Dog and
God.
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I now have another service dog that ditched school altogether and
became home schooled just like his older brother, Wyatt.  His name is
Mato, which means “Bear” in the Lakota Indian Language.  The “Bear” has
recently turned five and yes, Mato has taken up the legacy of what Wyatt
had meant to me in the past and together we are making our own memories.
Did I mention that both Wyatt and Mato are labs and both of them are
black.
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Life is good with God and Dog.
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The following words come from a short tune I heard a while back and it
is dedicated to dogs.
“You are my Buddy, my Pal and my Friend, so wherever you go I just want
you to know you are my Buddy, my Pal and my Friend.”
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In memory of another God/Dog, my beautiful nephew, Bailey.  Bailey
crossed over this February and Bailey was the proud service dog to his
Buddy, Pal and fFriend, Tony.  By the way, Bailey was also a black lab.
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One of Gods Great Gifts.
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God Bless You and God Bless America.
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5 Reason Why Veterans Need To Be Fishing

Filed Under Brain Injury, Combat PTSD, Dogs, Fishing Therapy, Military, Nature, PTSD, Service Dogs, Tears, Tears of a Warrior | Comments Off on 5 Reason Why Veterans Need To Be Fishing

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Guest Blog by Jon Sutton

 

Author: Travis Pike

Veterans are a unique group of people who face a variety of unique challenges in their lives. As unique as veterans maybe they do share the ability to benefit from an activity as old as civilization. We call it fishing. Here are 5 reasons why Veterans need to get out there and fish more.

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Getting Outside

Something as simple as getting outside and in nature can be a major benefit to your psyche and even your body. Getting outside doesn’t just mean walking out of your home, it means actually getting out in nature.

First, you get better air in the countryside than the city. There is no smoke, smog, or ground level ozone to worry about. As a veteran, you may have been exposed to harsh chemicals, and of course burn pits. Fresh air can help reduce the symptoms of most chronic respiratory illnesses.

You’ll also get a healthy dose of sunshine. Sunshine provides you with a blast of vitamin D, a vitamin associated with bone health. The average adult is likely vitamin D deficient, something I learned from my VA Doctor. A little sunshine can go a long way to long lasting health. That being said, don’t forget the sunscreen, you know what they say about too much of a good thing.

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Getting Physical

PT it’s good for you and good for me. With almost 80% of the veteran population being obese a little PT can likely go a long way. Most people may think of fishing as sitting in a chair and drinking a beer, but they’d be wrong. There is a big difference in fishing and getting buzzed in a boat.

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When you’re fishing you can be involved in any number of strenuous activities, including wading through water, paddling a kayak, and or hiking to a premier fishing location. That’s just to get to you to where you start fishing, from there you start working the shoulder and arms by casting over and over.

Plus, once you get a fish the cardiovascular activity starts as you fight that big boy to the boat or the shore. Watch any fishermen catch a keeper, and look how he sweats and struggles. It may not be as bad a Platoon Sergeant Death Run at 5 a.m. but it’ll get you huffing and puffing.

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Relax a Little

Ah, greeting the great outdoors with a fishing pole in one hand a tackle box in the other is an amazing way to relax. Veterans on average face the stress of everyday life, and with a high percentage of veterans facing stress, depression, and anxiety the ability to relax is sacred. Heck, just talking on the phone with the VA is enough to drive you mad.

Fishing has shown to reduce cortisol, a hormone associated with stress by over 30% for up to a month. A study by the University of Maine showed fishing reduced anxiety, stress, fear, and guilt by a substantial amount for up to 3 weeks in combat veterans.

On top of everything fishing reduces, time in the sunshine has proven to release a chemical known as serotonin. The theory is that serotonin improves moods and triggers happy thoughts.

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Keeps You Sharp

Young veterans face higher rates of TBI than the average population, which can result in reduced levels of cognitive ability. Let’s not forget that the Vietnam generation has reached an advanced age and with age often comes reduced cognitive function.

Fishing provides stimulation to the brain that engages a wide variety of different senses and forces fishers to use reasoning, and make logical assumptions. Fishing also boosts self-esteem and confidence.

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Cause Fish are Delicious

Everyone loves good food, that’s true. This may not be specific to veterans because fish is delicious. Fish is also packed with protein and is low in calories and cholesterol. It’s also full of healthy fats, like Omega 3 acids that help with joint health. Any infantry veteran will tell you their joints suck, so they need all the help they can get.

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Two Quotes from Rumi:

(Rumi was a 13th-century poet of immense talent. His work highlights the power of literature in its ability to transcend time, language and geographic locations)

 

1)  Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives.

 

2) The wound is the place where the light enters you.

 

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by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

It isn’t easy to move forward in life when you seem trapped by events that happened in the past. Often times the harder you try to get unstuck, the more bound you become to that very past. So how does one resolve such a dilemma? It probably won’t be without effort, time, and even some painful moments.

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In the book/movie, The Shack, the lead character is tormented by an unimaginable personal tragedy. No matter how hard he tries to move forward beyond his pain and horrendous memories, he can’t. Being caught in a terrible incident he is unable to see past his pain to the extent that very little joy or happiness can enter his life. In order to heal he is forced to go back to the place (the shack) where he got stuck; the place where the horror, the anguish, and the future was taken from him.

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I think this is what Tony was doing when he decided to return to Vietnam.  In order to heal more completely he made a choice to go back to the place where he became stuck, a space that over the last many decades unconsciously became his “shack”. Since his military service in Vietnam he has worked incredibly hard to move beyond the memories and the demons, but there were still times when the burden of combat obscured his vision and ability to live fully.  As part of the healing process he had to exhume the old earth in order to plant and allow for new growth to occur. He will be explaining more in his future blogs.

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Toward the end of the movie there was a beautiful metaphor about life.  A truism that most of us already know…. life is not neat or precisely organized.  It is messy, bumpy, and often unbalanced. Yet, it is this very assortment of messiness and disorder that make us who we are and who we can become if we are brave enough to return to our “shack”  to become unstuck.

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So what is your “shack”? What might you do to become “unstuck: (that doesn’t mean you have to physically return to a specific location to heal). Just know that this “becoming unstuck” will most likely not be easy, orderly, or without some deep potholes. It is a journey, like Tony, you may need to take alone. However, the reality is that you will not be totally on your own. Like Tony you will have the thoughts, prayers, and support of family and friends that will accompany you in spirit and hope.

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by Tony Seahorn

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We often talk and write about spending time in nature as an important element of the healing process.

For those with Post Traumatic Stress (PTSD or more accurately PTS), finding solace in natural places helps us realize and appreciate the marvelous wonders of the world.

Following is a link to an article that appeared this weekend in Parade Magazine worth reading.

Living in awe…

Feeling Awe May Be the Secret to Health and Happiness

 

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by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

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It is easy to see what courage looks like.  We observe it in the acts of those who, in spite of intense danger or inconceivable suffering, or endless determination, an individual continues to live on. To move forward.  We see it in the movies where it makes us feel safe and in control in events we know we may never survive.

But what does courage sound like? Does it reveal itself in words, in songs, in other types of media?  Perhaps real courage sounds like Silence.  The silence of grief that cannot be expressed in words.  The silence of a heart being shattered.  The silence of hidden tears and silent screams.

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And what does courage feel like?  It may be different for every person, yet, individually it contains some singular similarities. Our feelings, much like hearing, is silent beyond ourselves.  Emotions, an element of feelings, come at anytime, day or night.  It cannot be quantified, perhaps because we may not be able to find a beginning or end in its infinitesimal existence.  You see, feelings go beyond emotions. They are deeper, often jumbled together with anger, love, gratitude and sadness.  We feel what we feel.  Attempting to put feelings into words can be exhausting, exasperating, and mostly ineffective.

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Courage, like feelings and hearing is also Silent. It is very much present. There is both a sweetness and bitterness in courage. The sweetness of living through a reality that many may never experience.  The bitterness resulting from that very same experience.  It is not about the “why me”, “how come”, or “what ifs” of suffering. Simply having the courage to accept the experience for what it is— an experience that changes a person from the before to the now – and beyond.

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We spend too much time trying to define/identify courage. Most results are superficial at best.  For if, as I believe, courage is found only in the Silence… the empty spaces between the noise and what is seen, heard, and felt.  We often miss or mistakenly identify courage.  Its potential seed lives in most of us, yet, it can only be germinated when or if the time presents itself.  For some of you reading this piece may think, “What the heck is she rambling about?”  For others, those who have lived the courage, you may only nod your head and silently say “true”.

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WELCOME BACK!

by John DiCiacco – Guest Blog  (John is a veteran & brother who helps make a difference)

Jan & John

I can’t speak for every person who reads your blogs, but I can and will say this, I have missed not reading them.  The only thing that ever depressed me was the first paragraph in your latest blog.  You always come up with something that touches someone, whether it be thought provoking or light hearted.

Your words always mean something to someone. Blogs can and should present different topics and when folks consider one to be difficult to read, then they can choose not to read it. But don’t just complain to the author, because life isn’t always a bowl of cherries.

As we all know, you can’t be everything to everyone so don’t try. But please don’t stop writing your blogs. Take it from this Veteran, I have never read a single one of your blogs that made me feel depressed. You write about reality, especially meaningful to veterans and families who suffer from the wounds of war.

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I know that some times during any given month you have your own personal traumatic experiences that make life a little difficult and so you do your best to just survive. Just like the Veterans whom read your blogs.  When moments arrive that you can’t seem to come up with something to talk about, I can assure you that I do. Or have a Request Button on Note asking the readers if they have something that they would like to talk about through you.

Oh, by the way, your ticket into Heaven has already been secured. Your Ancestors and Guardian Spirits have made sure of that.

As you know, I spent two tours in the Nam and Holiday’s are still very hard for me. Too many Ghosts and way too much guilt for one man to carry.  The haunting reality for many Combat Veterans is the same unhealthy thought pattern we carry and wear on our chests like a sort of Medal.  That thought is this and I quote:  “Why in the hell am I here and not so and so”, or “I don’t have the right to celebrate or be happy when so many of my Brothers will never be here.”  Most Veteran’s never come right out and say these things but the thoughts are real and they and their fallen Comrades are there as well.

John at Vietnam Wall Memorial

Of course, in my efforts to be jolly I would have to self medicate and numb the pain just to get through the ordeal. Afterword the Guilt followed by the shame for drinking was much worse.

I don’t know how I got on all of this but I better stop.

You can blog me anytime you want.

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How you can honor our Vietnam vets

Filed Under Combat PTSD, Peace, PTSD, Tears of a Warrior, Troops, Veterans, Vietnam Veterans, War | Comments Off on How you can honor our Vietnam vets

Ann McFeatters: How you can honor our Vietnam vets

Guest Post from the Dallas Morning News:

By ANN MCFEATTERS

Published: 05 March 2015 07:27 PM

The man who said his name was Danny arrived at my door with a huge floral box. Inside was one of the most beautiful bouquets I’d ever seen.

Danny was with the Maryland highway department, supervising a crew installing new curbs on my street. He was also a Vietnam veteran who had seen the small blue star in my window, indicating two family members were serving in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Danny came from a generation that provided 9.2 million people who served in the military during the Vietnam era, many of whom came home from war reviled, not thanked for what they gave their country. Like most of his fellow veterans, Danny vowed to show only gratitude to those in military service, no matter what the politics of any current war that service members are called on to fight. Flowers to a stranger were to thank my family.

This month marks the 50th anniversary of the arrival of 3,500 Marines in Da Nang, South Vietnam, beginning 10 years of a terrible conflict that would sear and scar this nation.

In the “lessons learned” department, perhaps the most important is to separate the warrior from the war. Today Americans of all political stripes express sincere appreciation for what the men and women of the armed forces are called on to do for their country, whether the mission is popular or not.

The Vietnam Veterans Memorial on the mall in the nation’s capital, with its awesome wall designed by Maya Lin, engraved with the names of 58,300 people who gave their lives in the jungles of Southeast Asia, was meant as one way toward healing a divided, bitter country.

It has worked. The three-acre memorial with its gardens, wall, Vietnam Women’s Memorial and The Three Servicemen statue, is visited by 4.5 million people a year. Its website, with photos and information on veterans and messages from their friends and families, draws 4 million virtual visitors annually.

The veteran behind the memorial, Jan Scruggs, a man of enormous personality and drive who raised the $8 million needed to begin implementation of it, is retiring this year.

One way the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund plans to honor him and all the war’s veterans is to raise money for a $116 million underground education center to display some of the 400,000 personal items left at the wall by visitors, a unique occurrence which stunned the memorial’s founders.

From teddy bears to tear-stained letters, the items, stored in boxes maintained by the National Park Service, which owns the memorial, tell powerful stories.

Approved by Congress with no funding, the education center needs donations from the public if it is to be ready for a ribbon-cutting ceremony in 2020. Most of all, the Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund wants future generations to learn about the Vietnam era, how decisions were made and what they meant to the nation.

Tomorrow’s fifth-graders must learn they owe a debt to those who came before them and that they, too, must leave a legacy of service, the best way they are able. Technology will give them access to such things as digital oral histories from veterans and TV footage of the first war played out in the nation’s living rooms.

There are 7 million living Vietnam War veterans. Beyond those who died or went missing there, Vietnam veterans are still dying of injuries sustained in the war, such as exposure to Agent Orange and post-traumatic stress disorder. The fund’s CEO, Jim Knotts, a Desert Storm veteran, stresses that these veterans must be honored, and that good health care for all veterans must be a national priority.

Because of space restrictions, the education center will be the last major memorial built on the National Mall. Fifty years after the start of the Vietnam War, it is time to take the next step in honoring those who fought it, whether they wanted to or not.

Here’s to you, Danny, and all those like you.

FIFTY SHADES OF PTS(D)

Filed Under Combat PTSD, Fifty Shades, PTSD, Tears, Tears of a Warrior | Comments Off on FIFTY SHADES OF PTS(D)

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

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The big movie (at least for many women) seems to be Fifty Shades of Grey. Not having read the three book series or gone to the show (as of yetJ) I decided to check with my sister who has read all three. As she described the main character, a Mr. Grey, I asked her to tell me about the number “Fifty”.   What the “Fifty” supposedly refers to is what I expected…. Fifty shades of one’s personality, including some erotic sexual preferences.  Now I probably have some of your attention…

Yet, it is what she explained after my title question that was most intriguing. You see, Mr. Grey, being a brilliant, wealthy, handsome billionaire had a pretty troubling childhood. That early experience made him more than a little narcissistic and unable to have true, intimate relationships and feelings for others. What Mr. Grey displayed in his life and personality is what we all fall into, albeit, in different scenarios and reasons.  So here is where we all can relate to the Fifty Shades of Me or Fifty Shades of Post-Traumatic Stress. 

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Each shade of ourselves is colored by the time, place, situation, and prior experiences of our lives.  When we are calm and things in our daily lives are going well we are in that green, blue, maybe even lovely lavender zone. If the triggers are under control and the demons are taking a short nap, we are content, happy, and can go about our world looking fairly normal.

It is when all the crap hits the internal emotional “fan” that the colors of ourselves can change – pretty drastically and swiftly.  When our triggers are on edge from prior traumatic experiences, our emotive colors display very bright shades of crimson, reds, oranges, yellow…  The many hues of these shades have a huge impact on how we internalize the external world and all of its inhabitants and barriers.

In Post-Traumatic Stress, the weaver and tapestry are even more complex. There is no one way, right way, or best way to experience trauma and its aftermath. There is no singular impact that is 100% the same for each person’s prior experiences. Individual experience will shape the impact and actions of the trauma.

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The only thing that remains similar for most individuals is the anguish and uncertainty of how long the emotional pain will last.

Remember the adage, “What one resists, persists”. Dealing with intense emotions that have shaken one’s very core takes time to heal.

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Our personalities contain many different colors and various shades of each. Like Joseph’s Amazing Colored Coat, we too wear an array of colors depending on what is transpiring in our lives both past and present.  Our coat of many colors, our Fifty Shades of who we are came from each experience of life. The colors represent the tapestry of our history, our individuality, our temperament.

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A multicolored life is far more interesting than a bland, one color existence.  However, to display these beautiful, brilliant colors, we have to be unafraid to live each day with the courage to recognize we are clothed based on our experience.

Therefore, celebrate your fifty shades of who you are…. You earned each and every one of them.

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