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By Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D.

Two weeks ago Tony, Trooper, and I had the honor of being part of the annual Air Medical Transport Conference (AMTC) in Atlanta, Georgia. This conference was attended by pilots, flight crews, physicians, nurses and first responders from all over the world.  The convention was filled with individuals who have given and continue to give much of their lives to saving and helping others.  Many have served in the military, and many have been overseas in combat zones.  To say they are an inspiration to our communities is an understatement.  We were able to meet and talk with several individuals who shared their stories with such humility and purpose dedication. Like our military, these first responders serve their communities with courage and tenacity. They are with others at the most traumatic time of life.  They comfort, attend to injuries, and all too many times are the last person a victim sees at the time of death.

I was asked to be the keynote speaker for this amazing group. Of course, my presentation was on trauma and how it affects both our minds, bodies, and spirits.  It was the first time a keynote speaker at this event was requested to speak on the topic of trauma and Post-Traumatic Stress (PTS).  As in countless organizations, Post-Traumatic Stress is often the elephant in the room that most don’t want to discuss and sometimes even acknowledge.  Its presence is seen and felt, yet, little is done to heal and attend to the many traumatic experiences our first responders deal with every day.

To say I was both incredibly nervous and honored to be the keynote is an underestimation of my concerns.  I researched, practiced, and prayed for several months prior to the event hoping that the information in the keynote would make a difference to those attending.

 

I used the analogy of a “sheepdog”.  In September we were in Steamboat Springs, CO and watched a mixture of nine Border Collies, Great Pyrenees and Akbash sheepdogs meander behind their one-thousand herd/flock of sheep as they moved from summer range in the National Forest. These dogs are incredibly protective of their herd – keeping the herd together and fighting off predators at the peril of their own lives. They look so normal in their big, furry, white bodies, but make no mistake; they are ferocious in the task of watching over their sheep. Our first responders are like these sheepdogs.  They protect, tend to, and put their lives at risk for their communities.  The question I raised, just like with our military and veterans, who takes care of the sheepdogs?

 

 

 

As a society, it is our duty to make sure those who take care of us are taken care of as well. They see, hear, touch, smell, and feel events that most of us will never encounter. The burdens they carry are too often only theirs and held in the silence of their minds and hearts. Like our military and veterans many believe that if they are traumatized by their experiences, they are somehow inadequate, less fearless, and not as capable of doing their jobs.  This is totally inaccurate. One cannot function in a career of trauma without having some effects on his/her own well-being.  In fact, this is what makes them more compassionate and effective at their jobs.

A few statistics I learned while doing my research:

• 34% of first responders have Post-Traumatic Stress;
• Barely half of first responders have had any training into how to deal with their own trauma;
• Much like our military, first responders have a much higher suicide rate than the average population;
• Female critical nurses in ICU and flight nurses are four times more likely to developed ovarian cancer than their peers;

These are just a few of the statistics that should make us all concerned and ready to share the responsibility of taking care of those who take care of us.

 

Just like our military and veterans – “If we send them, then we MUST mend them.”

 

KEYNOTE SPEAKER:

Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D.

Dr. Seahorn has been a classroom teacher and administrator for forty years. She has taught as an adjunct professor for Colorado State University and several universities in the Denver area.  For the last ten years she has been teaching a class on Neuroscience and Learning at Colorado State University.  Jan has a BA in English/Elementary Ed., an endorsement/license in middle school education and administration, a MA in Gifted and Talented, and a Ph.D. in Human Development and Organizational Systems.  Her background includes an in-depth understanding of neuroscience research and effective instructional practices, organizational systems and change. She conducts numerous workshops on the Neuroscience of Learning & Memory Systems and the effects of “at-risk” stress environments on brain development.

Dr. Seahorn co-authored the award-winning book with her husband, Tears of a Warrior: A Family’s Story of Combat and Living With PTSD. The theme focus is on trauma and how it can impact the brain, body, and emotional development of an individual. Much of the research focused on Post-Traumatic Stress (PTS) and understanding how to identify and work with first responders and veterans who have experienced trauma and associated stress.  She and her husband Tony work extensively with military personnel, veterans, first responders and families on how trauma impacts the brain.  She also works with schools and communities on how trauma experienced in childhood through abuse, neglect, and other environmental conditions impact learning and behavior.

She has written two other books, When Crap Happens Grow Zucchini: A Book on How to Live with Dying and Appreciate the Crap

Foul Wisdom: Identifying the Turkeys and Eagles in your Organization and Life

A third illustrated book on her PTSD poem, Silent Scream, is currently in production.

Dr. Seahorn’s TED Talk on post-traumatic stress can be viewed on You tube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEHDQeIRTgs&feature=youtu.be

Janet and Tony have two adult sons, Chad and Christopher who enjoy living and working in the Rocky Mountain Region. Tony & Janet share their home with two Black Labradors, Trooper – a certified service dog, and Brody, a puppy being trained as a therapy dog to work in children’s court systems, hospitals, and schools.  The family enjoys travel and outdoor activities: history, geography, hiking, fly-fishing, rafting, snow skiing and anything that puts them in touch with nature.  Janet also volunteers with several animal shelters in Colorado.

 

 

 

 

By Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 TED (Technology, Entertainment, Design) is a global set of conferences run by the private non-profit Sapling Foundation, under the slogan “Ideas Worth Spreading”.

 

It continues to be an overly busy few months.  We are waiting for things to slow down a bit, yet, as soon as we are done with one “To Do List” another pops up with an even bigger task sheet.  It begs the question as to whether we are really that harried, or if we are more easily exhausted because we aren’t all that youthful any more.  OK, don’t go to that disheartening place.

 

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to do a TED Talk at Colorado State University where I’m a professor in the Education College. Of course my topic was Post Traumatic Stress. After months of putting together the talk and multiple practice sessions, the day finally arrived. Truthfully, when I was first accepted as a speaker I was quite excited. As the day for the TED event grew closer I became more anxious.  It wasn’t the fear of talking in front of large groups of people – we do that often.  It was trying to fit twenty years of research and essential information into a fifteen minute timeframe that drove me to panic. This was more like the old television show, Name That Tune, in which the contestant was given only the first three or four notes of a song and expected to know its name; a seemingly impossible task for discussing Post Traumatic Stress and its effects on the brain, body, and spirit.

 

As I entered the stage area I felt like Katniss from the Hunger Games, going into a life and death battle without the proper equipment. You will have to listen to the talk (the information is in this blog), to see the results.  Be sure to go to watch the very end for a surprise appearance of our service dog, Bailey.  Tony, unbeknownst to me, brought him to the event and sent him up on stage at the very end of my talk.  OMG!!!!

 

Ted Talk: 15 minutes worth hearing!

Understanding PTSD’s Effects on Brain, Body, and Emotions | Janet Seahorn | TEDxCSU – YouTube

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BEHDQeIRTgs

WELCOME BACK!

by John DiCiacco – Guest Blog  (John is a veteran & brother who helps make a difference)

I can’t speak for every person who reads your blogs, but I can and will say this, I have missed not reading them.  The only thing that ever depressed me was the first paragraph in your latest blog.  You always come up with something that touches someone, whether it be thought provoking or light hearted.

Your words always mean something to someone. Blogs can and should present different topics and when folks consider one to be difficult to read, then they can choose not to read it. But don’t just complain to the author, because life isn’t always a bowl of cherries.

As we all know, you can’t be everything to everyone so don’t try. But please don’t stop writing your blogs. Take it from this Veteran, I have never read a single one of your blogs that made me feel depressed. You write about reality, especially meaningful to veterans and families who suffer from the wounds of war.

I know that some times during any given month you have your own personal traumatic experiences that make life a little difficult and so you do your best to just survive. Just like the Veterans whom read your blogs.  When moments arrive that you can’t seem to come up with something to talk about, I can assure you that I do. Or have a Request Button on Note asking the readers if they have something that they would like to talk about through you.

Oh, by the way, your ticket into Heaven has already been secured. Your Ancestors and Guardian Spirits have made sure of that.

As you know, I spent two tours in the Nam and Holiday’s are still very hard for me. Too many Ghosts and way too much guilt for one man to carry.  The haunting reality for many Combat Veterans is the same unhealthy thought pattern we carry and wear on our chests like a sort of Medal.  That thought is this and I quote:  “Why in the hell am I here and not so and so”, or “I don’t have the right to celebrate or be happy when so many of my Brothers will never be here.”  Most Veteran’s never come right out and say these things but the thoughts are real and they and their fallen Comrades are there as well.

Of course, in my efforts to be jolly I would have to self medicate and numb the pain just to get through the ordeal. Afterword the Guilt followed by the shame for drinking was much worse.

I don’t know how I got on all of this but I better stop.

You can blog me anytime you want.

 

by Tony Seahorn

                

Reading and reflecting on Jan’s recent blog made me realize – one more time — that life is truly fragile.

The Vietnam War was a life changing event for the countless veterans and families who were directly impacted, including me.

For those of us who were fortunate to return from the field of battle, the everyday living of life will continue to be defined by what we experienced then.

 

 

 

 

Fast forward to the present day – 2014.

In May, following recovery from knee surgery at the Cheyenne, WY VA Hospital, I had my annual physical – including EGK and Treadmill Test. Other than the fact that the cardiologist reminded me I’m no longer 21, the physical and other tests all looked good.

 

 

Periodically I have chest pain as a result of remaining shrapnel and scar tissue from combat wounds; cardiovascular tests have always been negative for heart problems.

 

During our annual Wounded Warrior Event in late June, I was guiding a wounded veteran during high-water run-off on the Upper North Platte River. Unfortunately a raft from a separate river party encountered a dangerous log strainer in the main river current and capsized their raft. Three of the rafters made it to shore while a fourth person was submerged and pinned beneath the raft under the huge log jam.

I was able to secure my drift boat and veteran in a small backwater and spent the next hour in vain trying to rescue the rafting victim. The water was freezing and after an exhausting attempt, I was unable to save the trapped person. The time spent in the water subjected me to hyperthermia, but I eventually recovered sufficiently to continue the river float as the day warmed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

In late July, I spent a week with our two sons in Montana on a fly fishing adventure. Toward the end of the week, we were climbing out of the Yellowstone River Canyon when I began to experience mild chest pain. By walking slowly and resting I was able to resume our hike and had no problem for the remainder of the trip.

 

 

 

 

 

 

In September, my VA doctor wanted to perform a follow-up exam on intermittent pain I was having in my right shoulder and chest from what we thought was caused by shrapnel. During the tests, an abnormality was found on the EKG and Treadmill that did not exist during my physical in May.

An electrocardiogram located a blockage in my main exterior frontal lobe artery. A heart procedure was performed via my femoral artery and a stint placed in mid-October. The team of Cardiologists concluded that I must have experienced a minor heart attack during the river rescue recovery in June. The cold water and lower body temperature prevented any pain or other potential damage.

As fate would have it, a week following the heart procedure, I was rushed to the local ER for severe stomach bleeding. Prescribed Plavix blood thinner combined with high doses of pain medication is not a good combination. Three emergency surgeries later and 8 units of whole blood finally stopped the bleeding. My hospital stay: 4 days ICU and 3 days recovery and monitoring.

Now 15 pounds lighter, I’m still weak and lack energy, but hopefully on the high road to recovery.

Life is full of challenges as well as an abundance of blessings! Today my black lab, Hunter Bailey and I are going pheasant hunting.

 

Life is good.

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 

PREFACE

            For too many individuals, there may often be days when one feels he/she cannot continue to withstand the struggle and obstacles of the many agonies of the past. The feelings can be overwhelming and consume our minds and bodies with darkness. It is at this time when a favorite, inspirational quote or a poem of encouragement may help us get through a really bad day.  It is for this reason, I wrote the poem, Against All Odds. If we believe we can, hopefully, we can. And surely as there is day and night, sunshine and rain, joy and sadness, if we believe we can’t, then we won’t.

 

AGAINST ALL ODDS

Janet J. Seahorn

 

Against All Odds I will survive.

Courage and grit will be my guides.

Against All Odds the demons within

May sometimes grow but never win.

 

Against All Odds I will find joy

Hate and chaos I will avoid.

Against All Odds I’ll fight my fears

And not be afraid of cleansing tears.

 

Against All Odds I’ll endure my pain

Knowing that rainbows come after a rain.

Against All Odds I shall be kind

Even if anger sways my mind.

 

Against All Odds I’ll choose to believe

That peace and happiness I can receive.

For this I know without a doubt

Against All Odds I will win out.

 

You not only can, but will do what needs to be done to be healed, to be whole, to be healthy in mind, body, and spirit…Against All Odds.

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

          It has been a very difficult past few months for many individuals and communities inAmerica. Between Hurricane Sandy destroying property and lives in the northeastern part of our country, to the incomprehensible tragedy in Connecticut. Too often we try to put words to these events, hoping to impart some small bit of insight, but they seem too shallow and futile.

At times, when the heart has felt so much suffering and inhumanity, the soul becomes a vacuum of despair. The challenge remains one of deep spiritual courage. The courage to believe in goodness instead of evil. The courage to awake each morning and keep going, knowing the struggle ahead still exits.  And the courage to forgive, to hope, and to still love. Sometimes the best way to convey these staggering emotions is through music. For this reason I thought a song by the young singer, Jackie Evancho, may convey a message of hope for a New Year – far better than simply words.

In my imagination I see a right world
where everybody lives in peace and honesty
I dream of souls always free
like clouds which fly
full of humanity deep inside

In my imagination I see a clear world
the night is less dark over there
I dream of souls always free
like clouds which fly full of humanity

In the imagination there is a hot wind
which blows on cities, as a friend
I dream of souls always free
like clouds which fly
full of humanity deep inside

www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQF-l9NBtX8

In this coming New Year, may the words from Nella Fantasia come true.

So, Dream With Me.

Guest Blog:

 by Jim Fountaine, Vietnam Veteran

A man of eighteen years, barely dry behind the ears hears Uncle Sam’s call and in eight short weeks the change is as radical as a caterpillar into a Butterfly. Only this change has no beauty to it. A young boy is transformed into a soldier, an instrument of war.

            The days of taking his girl to Lover’s Leap, skipping class to go fishing are gone. He is thrust into a world of violence against his fellow man. He begins to see the ravages of war. He learns to kill, not for sport or for food, but for territory, ideals. He does learn these skills with dedication and without question because he is doing what he is ordered to do!

            Then, suddenly, he is thrust in a world of pain, death, blood and pure fear.  He sees things that no amount of education or training has prepared him for. His friends are now few and close, yet distant because getting too close will cause pain when that friend is no longer there. The cold, damp, heat, loneliness become his constant companion. Sometimes he tries to deaden the pain with booze. He fights himself to bury what he sees. He keeps doing his job without emotion because he feels if he feels he’ll go nuts.

            Then suddenly it’s all over and he sheds his uniform and finds himself back on main street U.S.A.  When he sees his old school mates he finds he no longer has anything in common with them. He cannot talk about his experiences because they won’t understand. He finds he has had his youth robbed from him. He no longer trusts those around him with the ease he once did.

            He has wounds you cannot see; not wounds of the body but wounds of the soul, the mind and the spirit, and no one can see them. No one can see the scars. He drifts back into a time when he felt the pain for real. He seeks out answers he cannot find. At times he feels out of control, so tries to find things he believes that will give him control like booze, drugs or he buries himself in work almost to the point of exhaustion.

            He withdraws from relationships for fear of loss. He rejects authority for that authority brought him harm in the past. He feels alone in a vast world that doesn’t seem to care. He hurts, but no one can see the wounds; no one hears his cries for help. He is judged by people by what they see on the surface. They don’t see the Unseen Wounds in him. They don’t hear his silent cries and all he can do is ask, “Why can’t you see what this is doing to me?”

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 

I saw God today. He appeared in many forms and shapes. Some were tall with crippled arms and legs. Some were young with broken hearts and tangled minds. One was weathered with a long, white-bearded, grizzly face. Amazing how God changes and morphs into such diverse appearances. Yet, each face had eyes that seemed to explain wisdom, pain, and hope.

As with such celestial beings, God tends to surround himself with legions of angels. They support, guide, and maintain an environment of light and joy. You see, God cannot do all the tasks he has to accomplish without some assistance.

Such was my experience with the second annual Wounded Warrior Event held in Saratoga,Wyoming. The faces of God traveled in metal chariots through high mountain ranges and wide fields of swaying hay. When the convoy arrived at their destination they were welcomed by the hosts of the Saratoga Resort. Once settled in rooms filled with cowboy furnishings, God was taken to the beautiful Upper Cedar Creek Ranch owned by Tom and Dixie Arthur. Horses and a special mule named Henry awaited His arrival ready to gently carry God to a pristine mountain lake where he could rest, fish, and replenish his mind, heart, and spirit. Angels continually encircled him, focused on quietly serving and ensuring His few hours on the mountain were peaceful and revitalizing.

The following morning God had one more opportunity to experience the splendor of hisWyoming landscape where He engaged in amazing fishing at Big Creek Ranch. New adventures lead by Mark Dunning facilitated hours of fun and entertainment. The day culminated in an evening barbecue with appreciative community members and the staff of the Saratoga Resort led by general manager, Susan Wallace. Each simply sought one last chance to say thank you. Thank you for your service. Thank you for your sacrifice. Thank you for your courage.

Finally, God was sent on His way with a goodbye breakfast provided by the town’s American Legion Post.

Yes, I saw God today and I was blessed, both by his presence and his multitude of angels who continue to give so much to keep us safe and free. And once again I realized how even God within every individual needs time to rest, to replenish, to experience peace in order to persevere with the journey ahead. As you go through your hectic days, take time to see God in those who pass your way and be grateful for the divine in each being’s special presence.

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

For centuries societies have been trying to explain why warriors return from combat “stranger” than before they had left.  In our book, Tears of a Warrior, we wrote about how the Roman’s sent their troops who had recently arrived back from battle to a tranquil farm away from the city to recoup from their emotional wounds.

It seems like every war had its own special term for such suffering; words such as combat fatigue, shell shock, warrior’s heart, etc. However, none of these really explained much about why the individual wasn’t able to put the war behind them and get on with their lives.

Joe Novak, another of our readers sent this YouTube video to Tony. For the person who has never experienced combat, this will be an informative eight minute clip which both “shows” and “tells” the effects of battle. For those who have been to hell and back, you may not need to view the film; you have already lived it. If you do, keep the last message in mind as you continue your healing journey back to your new normal.

http://www.greatamericans.com/video/Vietnam-Vets-and-PTSD;Veterans-Videos

Blessings and, once again, Thank You for Your Service.

Tony and Jan Seahorn

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 

        A few weeks ago, Tony and I spent several days in the Grand Strand area of Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.

It was Military Appreciation Week.

Due to the special invitation of Retired Army Officer Sinclair Swan, we had the privilege of working with two local groups of military veterans, their spouses and family members.

             During the day we met with several group members and their spouses. It was an amazing opportunity to not just speak to the individuals in attendance, but to listen and hear their stories as well.  Each account reminded us of the enormous amount of courage it takes to get up each day, live it as best one can, and give back to others.

            Two of the veterans have adult children who experienced traumatic car accidents which left them with severe head injuries. These vets are now the primary care givers. Not only have they endured their own trauma; now they must bear the suffering of their children. Several are challenged by serious health issues for them and/or their spouses.

           Yet, they continue with great effort and fortitude to move forward. It is a humbling gift to have others shares their trauma and heartbreaks.

          Contrary to some public perspective, most of these vets have lived and are living successful and productive lives. In spite of their demons, they have deliberately chosen to not let the past destroy the future. They have elected to make a difference for themselves, their families, their communities. Sinclair Swan meets every Saturday with vets who need help in filling out government forms to obtain services. Each has made significant contributions to serving others.

            One individual wrote a special poem many years ago. Upon returning from Vietnam he described how he became homeless, sleeping in parks, and getting his “fixes” when needed. Then, one day, another homeless friend suggested they go to a church soup kitchen for a meal. It was there that a miracle occurred and his life changed. He got his faith back, his spirit, and eventually his life. At that time he wrote a poem which he has allowed us to share with you.

 A Poem

By William Huffaker

 

If I only had one wish to make,

but that wish would surely come true.

I’d wish that I would be given the light

to turn the darkest sky into blue.

 

Now to you this may sound

like my mythical dreams

have blurred my vision

so that this only seems

to be an illusion

of hopeful abound,

and that my wish

I’ve not really found.

 

But I’ve found it I tell you.

As I’ve sought it in truth.

And I know now this answers’

been here since my youth.

But I just couldn’t see

through the clouds in my mind.

Through delusions of grandeur

I just couldn’t find.

This fabulous dream

that just had to be,

waiting and knowing,

someday that I’d see.

 

And even though skies

still sometimes turn black.

And visions of grandeur

still sometimes come back.

I know that there’s light

in the darkest of night.

And the tenderest loves

never far from my sight.

 

And now that my dream

has become something true.

If I had one more wish,

I would wish it for you.

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